1. The epigraph reads “An atom of space remains between, even in the closest relationship.” What in the novel shows that, no matter how close two people are, there is still space between them? Can a person ever completely know another person? Have you seen this in your own life?
2. What was your reaction to Juliana’s situation as shown in the Prologue? What did you expect to happen from then on?
3. We readers know some of the things Juliana’s parents know and don’t know about her. What does Will not know about Susan? Susan about Will? What does Michael not know about another
4. Have you ever experienced discussing how to say good-bye at the end of someone’s life?
5. Grief is universal; grievers are distinctive. How did Susan, Will, Katie, and Michael handle their grief during this time?
6. What will be the continuing struggle as the characters move beyond this first week and through the next year?
7. What did Will and Susan find out, or think (imagine) they found out, about Julia?
8. What was your favorite discovery, story about what really was going on in Julia’s life?
9. What was your favorite part of the book? What was your least favorite?
10. What surprised you about this book?
11. Can you think of anything you might leave behind that your family or friends might find “illuminating” or “surprising” about you?
12. Endings can be happy or sad, satisfactory or unsatisfactory, or a mixture. How would you classify the ending of To Know Her?
13. Every book worth its paper tells us something about ourselves or the world around us. What did you learn about yourself or your world?